Nanny Bloomberg and Moms Demand Action make mass murder card for would be killers

Think like a killer for a second. You want to go out in a blaze of CNN klieg lights and dominate the news cycle for days. You want them to give you in death all the “respect” you were denied all your life. All you have to do to get this attention is to slaughter a bunch of innocent people.

So where do you go to maximize the casualties? Why a “Gun-Free” zone of course! How humiliating would it be if you hauled out your gun and tried to kill some folks only to get burned down by a housewife in the shower curtain aisle of Bed Bath & Beyond? You’d be the laughingstock of the entire country!

Luckily, Moms Demand Action, a wholly owned subsidiary of Michael Bloomberg, Inc. has printed up this handy-dandy guide to gun free locations for you to terrorize.

Mass Murder Bingo

You might get killed in the Bed Bath & Beyond, but IKEA is totally gun free! It’ll be like shooting fish in a barrel! Swedish Fish, in a Swedish barrel!

You could get your head blown off in an Office Depot, but in Staples, you’re biggest fear is getting a paper cut while mowing down defenseless people!

And who could forget the Kroger grocery store here in Garner? I go there all the time carrying a gun. Can you imagine your humiliation when you catch a .45 ACP in the face? No, go to Whole Foods instead! Mass numbers of underfed hippies with too much cash and reflexes slowed by living off granola instead of meat. Plus, if you get tired during your slaughter, you could always fortify yourself in the bulk nut and snack aisle!

All you future mass murderers should make sure to put a great big thank you to Nanny Bloomberg and Moms Demand Action for helping you find all the easy places to commit mass murder. Future terrorists, too! School shootings are so last week. Do something original and knock over a Modells.

And make sure to print and carry you Moms Demand Action card with you so you don’t wander into the wrong store by mistake.

It’s a mistake that could cost you your life!

HT: Miguel

23 responses to “Nanny Bloomberg and Moms Demand Action make mass murder card for would be killers

  1. Wow, that’s great – I feel so much safer already, and of course I’ll be sure to leave my Roscoe in my car (in plain view) when I go in these places (NOT)!

  2. Looks like I have some shopping habits to change – cant support these businesses!

  3. Presented without further comment.

    They no post, I no leave in car. They post, I take business elsewhere. I have no doubt that I wasn’t the only one carrying there either.

    Big difference between being safe and feeling safe.

  4. Mike, be wary of that for this reason. Many of those businesses have that “policy” merely as a CYA tactic by the lawyers. The lawyers think it provides them extra indemnification should a crazy guy come in and shoot up the place.

    Further many of these stores do not actually post. The reason being especially out in the area where I live, you’d be dumb to. I don’t open carry in those stores which are a grey area and as long as you’re not drawing attention to yourself you’ll be fine.

    If I see it’s posted, I walk away. If it’s buried in some “corporate policy” then I really don’t care because it’s legal boiler plate and honestly isn’t binding to the customer other than they can ask you to leave… in which case I’ll take my money elsewhere.

  5. Thanks for the list of gun free zones. No i can feel sooo much safer when i go to these places. Hey. Just an Idea. How about making schools gun free. That would solve everything. No more school shootings. Why didn’t we think of this before.

  6. I like the way Wisconsin took care of this problem. If a business DOES NOT post they will be immune to any lawsuits if something were to happen. If something happens and they are posted they are liable for your patrons safety. Signs are coming off of the windows once they figure out the new laws. 😉

  7. George P. Burdell

    Um, point of order here. Groupon is “gun free”? WTF?

    Am I not allowed to be carrying my gun when I’m checking out the day’s Groupon on my iphone? I never knew that Groupon had brick-n-mortar stores now…

  8. In my sleepy little town we have none of the businesses listed on the mass murder road map and I’m pretty proud to say that.

  9. Staple stores near me are not posted, and I’m more concerned about banks not financing gun buyers & sellers.

  10. Ikea: shooting lutfisk in a barrell.

    The real question is, are these stores bomb free zones? I wouldn’t feel safe knowing anybody could come in with a pressure cooker bomb in a backpack. We need a sign that tells the terrorists they are not welcome. Maybe a muslim free zone? I guess that would a barbecue joint.

  11. Matthew Carberry

    Yup, posting is very much a regional thing, I have to think pretty hard to come up with any posted places of those companies here in Anchorage.

    In any event, all they can do is ask you to leave in most of the states I’m familiar with, signs don’t necessarily carry force of law.

    I’d be willing to bet many of those companies actually just have “according to state and local law” policies anyway. We know MAIG lies about its members, no reason to assume this ad tells the real story.

  12. Pingback: SayUncle » Gun-free businesses

  13. George Burdell, Groupon stopped doing anything related to guns – for example, you used to be able to get groupons for stuff like CCW classes, but not any more.
    Barron, the local Costco stores are pulling the signs (that I never did manage to find, anyway) supposedly because the language is in the “member agreement” already and all they will do if they have to deal with you is pull your card. In my experience, you would be VERY foolish to assume a Costco is a real gun-free zone (around here, anyway 🙂

  14. A couple of those are strange, at least in my experience. I’ve OC’ed in many CVS Pharmacy stores and in several Bank of America branches in a couple different states, including one with an armed guard, and I never had a problem, either with signage or attitude problems. I know that BoA had some issues on the merchant/commercial side a while back regarding gun-related businesses, but unless it is a very recent change, there are no issues on the retail side. YMMV

  15. The odd thing is they are not posted where I live. Only posted for unlicensed. Bar snt posted 51% either.
    The r us’ have the corporate provided sign bu not the legally required on.

  16. In my state, Alaska, state law says if you don’t post, carrying is fine. If you do post, the sign has to be a certain size and black lettering on a white background. I’ve seen places with different no gun signs, guess what-the sign is illegal!

  17. Matthew Carberry

    Jim,

    Not being contrary, but the size and lettering regs went away a few years ago, the only controlling Alaska reg with criminal penalties, other than private homes, signage or not, is:

    Alaska Stat. § 18.65.755. : Alaska Statutes – Section 18.65.755.: Places where permittee may not possess a concealed (a) A permittee may not possess a concealed handgun
    (1) [Repealed, Sec. 7 ch 62 SLA 2003].(2) anywhere a person is prohibited from possessing a handgun under state or federal law.(b) [Repealed, Sec. 20 ch 1 SLA 1998].(c) In addition to any other penalty provided by law, a person who violates this section is guilty of a class B misdemeanor.

    The only remaining statute, left orphaned in terms of criminal sanction, is:

    13 AAC 30.110. Notification of places where concealed handguns may not be carried

    (a) Repealed 5/8/2002.(b) Nothing in this chapter or in AS 18.65.700 – 18.65.790 precludes a person from posting, to the extent allowed by law, a notice regarding the carrying of a concealed handgun.

    They can post, but the “extent of law” no longer has any penalty. Just like the University, all they can do is trespass you, which they can do for almost any reason.

  18. Well, seeing as how I carried concealed with a permit….I’ll guess I’ll go where I like and take my chances at being asked to leave the store after I pop a would be spree shooter. How do you like them apples?

  19. I don’t go to movie theaters, so the fact that most chains have this mandatory defenseless policy doesn’t affect me.

    I go to CVS occasionally, but I have never seen a sign posted.

    And I wouldn’t bait a hook with anything from Fridays, Red Robin or Buffaloe Wild Wings.

  20. Let me put it this way: If the businesses are not in compliance with the laws of the state they are located in, they are cordially invited to . . . Well, never mind. Suffice it to say that if they do not have proper, correct, legal signs posted, they can not ban firearms.

    And even if they did, is that really gong to stop someone who’s willing to break the law?

    Why, if such stupid laws and policies actually worked, then only criminals would have guns.

    Doesn’t that make you feel safe?

  21. Unless they have metal detectors and armed guards I really don’t care what signs they put up.

  22. What I don’t understand is gun owners knowingly enriching business that either passively or actively seek to make them defenseless. I will not frequent any of these establishments that I have in the past and I will let them know the reason. TS

  23. Thanks for the list of businesses that I won’t be patronizing ever again. Thanks MDA for making it possible for me to spend my hard earned money where my Natural and Constitutional Rights are respected